Cat Lady and the harassing fly...

I was telling Derek about the insane cat lady who wished me a "good day" yesterday at the mall.....actually, she more like demanded that I had a good day...anyway, it occurred to me that almost EVERY time I go somewhere I come into contact with a crazy. Is it just me I wondered? Yes. Derek informed me that it never happens to him....What is it about me? The fact that I make it a point to NOT smile, or even make eye contact with the weirdos that have the look in their eye that they are just itchin' to say something to me? And usually as they are walking over to me to make their ridiculous remarks I am mumbling under my breath "here we go again" and try to distract myself so that I look busy. Maybe I should just get a tattoo across my forehead that says "I bite" or something......hahahhaa.
Anyway - the low-down on the kids for the day so far...Chasie has a new found love for butter and just demanded that I put more on her toast, even though she's already eaten almost ALL of the toast and only has an itty bitty little corner left. "More Butter!!!!" Note to self: she will eat incredibly burnt bread. And why was the toaster turned all the way to the darkest setting? Now she is stabbing the couch with a fork. Srsly....This is gonna be a long day. And as for Jacob....he's crabby, very crabby. He has been since about 11 last night. And is now being harassed by a fly.......I will squish it! The fly, not the baby.
So I realiz *WAIT!!!!!!!!!!* OK, I was mid sentence, trying to let you know that I realized last week that my life is complete chaos, when Chasie "accidentally" dumped her fruit cup on the couch, of course it all went between the cushions...so there I am, scooping mandarin oranges out of the couch with my hand and I look over and see that dang fly smack in the middle of Jacobs forehead and him looking at me like I'm the insane one, so being the knob that I am, I take my hand and shoo the fly away....yea, it was the hand that I was digging fruit out of my couch with...now my poor baby not only has a fly on his forehead....he's also got mandarin oranges. Then...just because I felt completely.........whats the word......"overjoyed" with motherhood, I threw my head back and laughed hysterically.....what else was I suppose to do? Then I realized how crazy that last minute really was, so I just laughed harder. To make matters worse, my phone was ringing in the background...most of you probably haven't heard my ringtone, Its a recording of my sister in law Candace saying over and over again "That's what she said!, that's what she said!! Thats - What - She-SAAAAAAiIIIIDDDDdDD!!!!!!" (We love The Office) Chasie officially thinks Im insane. Get use to it child, there's a lot more to come.
So anyway - back to my original thought. I realized last week that my life is complete chaos when we were driving to Fuddruckers...of course I was being chauffeured by Derek (I sat in the back seat with the kids cuz they were crazy)....anyway.......Here's me...."Chasie, get your foot off the baby....Chasie don't lick the baby........Chasie get your foot out of your mouth..." *Sigh*....not a moment of peace.