People deal with stress in many different ways. Some eat their way through it, relying on food for comfort. I on the other hand cant even stomach the thought of food. I havent eaten in days, I cant stand up without seeing stars. I dry heave like all day long, which is actually a really good ab workout, but trust me its not fun. I try to get my mind off my troubles but it seems impossible. I cant even get a full nights sleep because I wake myself up like every 20 minutes worring about the same old crap. I just want to know that everything is going to be ok, and that my life will one day be back to normal. I'll even settle for semi-normal at this point. I feel like the only person in the world who is dealing with what I am going through and it seems like everyone else right now is in a perfect relationship with tons of love and snuggles and it makes me want to throw up....well in my case dry heave. UGH!
To top off everything both of my toilets are broken. The handel on one is totally jacked and weird and the other one is running (I know what your thinking... "Better go catch it!!!!" Dar-har-har-har) I wish my dad lived close by cuz he could fix them in like a minute. Im on my own though.
And I HATE being alone. Im alone a lot right now, you know, since Derek moved out and all. Nights are especially hard. Its not like we shared a bed or anything, actaully we went a good 7 years sleeping in seperate rooms, but just knowing that he was in the other room was somewhat of a comfort. Now, knowing that Im in the house all by myself brings a terrible feeling to me. I have a baseball bat next to my bed, I guess that helps too. Whatever, it sucks!
I totally need to get my hair did too, and guess what, I dont have the money to do that either!! I guess I will be half blond and half brunette, unless there is someone out there who wants to do my hair for trade....I can babysit or clean your house or something...I dont know........whatever.
Yea sorry to be such a downer lately, I actually told myself that this post was going to be positive and cheery and stuff but whatever, I dont have it in me! Im stressed to the max!!
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
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9 comments:
Do you want my hubby to come look at the toilets? He's pretty good with that kind of thing. He doesn't get home till late tonight (like 8:30) but if you can wait that long, it's no problem. Let me know.
Mia-
This is toatlly random, but one totally boring day I was blog-hopping and saw your name in a blog list..And I wondered if it was the same Mia that was my Visting Teacher..(i think you came once.)Anyway like I said RANDOM! Well I bet you dont even remember me (we were living right down the street from ya) I still live really close but we moved, anyway.. I didnt want to leave a comment I just didnt see an email or anything, I hope you dont think I am a totally crazy girl!tod_shara@yahoo.com
MIA! this is making me sad. I'm in a helpless position. I say what can i do but I know theres nothing. you said derek has the kids tonight so lets go out.
I'm so sorry you are feeling so terrible lately... You deserve the best, you are so sweet! I would love to do your hair, maybe we can trade and you can make me a few of those darling pettiskirts for my baby girl! Sound like a plan let me know Love ya lots!!!!
The bat is a good idea. Last night I woke up to a noise, totally scared and called the cops. Raul was here but I wouldnt let him go check it.
Anywho...I know how you feel. Being alone is scary. Wish I could help somehow.
Next time I call I will shut up and just listen - unless you want me to talk :) I'm good at that.
I hope you feel like you can turn to the Lord right now. He loves you, he wants to be there for you. I promise.
Please let me know if there is anything I can do or my sister can do. I know you don't know her that well but she lives in town and is a super listener.
Hang in there chica...
Mia, I'm so sorry for all that you are going through. Can we get together on Monday? Let me know if you are up for it. Oh, and my sis does hair in Scottsdale. If you are interested, I could ask her to give you the family discount. Let me know if you're interested. You are a strong woman Mia. Please let me know what I can do for you. Love, Kari
Mia Man do I know some of what you're feeling. My heart aches for you. It really truly does. I don't want to butt in where I'm not wanted but please know you are an AWESOME woman!!! You do deserve to be happy no matter what. I would love to do anything I can for you!! Please know you are not alone in this tough time. If theres anything at all I can do please let me know. Love you!!! Melia
Youre not alone, not the only one going through what your doing through, just the only one brave enough to blog about it. I completely understand, if you ever want to talk I'm here. It's super hard, but it will get better, you will get stronger and things will turn around.
I may not look like I'm in the same boat right now, but I'm damn close. And was TOTALLY where you are 6 months ago. The point is, things WILL change. They WILL get better. It just takes time.
I hope you can come back soon so we can hang out and talk! Miss yer guts!
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